Often when things don’t go as planned, we can become discouraged and it may even make us question “Am I on the right track” or “how can I ever recover from this situation”. The path can seem dark and at times even hopeless, unfixable and irreplaceable, but there is no situation that you cannot overcome. I met an entrepreneur at a conference a few years ago; she told her life story; at the age of 16, she got pregnant and became the shame of her town which was very religious; people looked down on her.

She got married and left town. Some years later, she moved back and started a business which today is a successful company, providing employment to people in that town. A different attitude to life could have resulted in a negative spiral, but she was determined to change and rewrite her story. She said the desire to provide for her children was a driving force in her life.

Today she is a role model in that same town and evidence that you are not your circumstances. Regardless of what your story is, you can rewrite it. Stories like this and my own journey inspired my book I AM THE GATEKEEPER: 101 Daily Keys to Unlock Your Happiness, Overcome Adversity and Fulfill Your Purpose. Here are three keys to help you overcome your mistakes and setbacks:

“Always Winning” Attitude: You are always winning regardless of the outcomes of your pursuits. Declare yourself “a master of comebacks”. I believe two things come out of adversity; the first one is a lesson. You would probably not have learnt how to deal with a similar situation in the future had you not personally have this experience. It is preparing you for something bigger on your path and if you view this mistake or challenge as a lesson, rather than a setback, you can move on to winning on your other goals. The second thing that comes out of adverse situations, is a blessing.

Sometimes we experience setbacks on a certain path because life wants to redirect us to the path that better serves us. That does not mean that the goal or desire you have is not meant for you, it probably means that the way you want to achieve it is not the best path. Often we are fixed on a particular person or action to achieve our goals, but there is more than one way to do it, so stay positive and stay open.

Let Go of the Past: Easier said than done, but today is a new day and a new chance to recreate who you want to be. Perhaps your actions have hurt a lot of people, maybe you lost money but this is not the end. You can change it all today. Maybe you can’t fix the past relationships or the business that you lost, but there are new relationships waiting for you and new opportunities. Even though you messed up in the past ask yourself “what have I learnt and how can I do better now”.  Do not be afraid to ask for help.

When you acknowledge that whatever mistakes you made in the past, is as a result of the information that you had at the time, now that you know better, do better.  Look back at the past only to see how far you have come and create your new story.

Embrace Your Wilderness Experience: We all go through a period in our lives where it feels like you are stuck between where you want to be and where you are now. Nothing seems to be working or changing. Embrace this time, because it is a time of preparation. The feeling of emptiness is only a transitional period. Focus on building that bridge that will help you move forward. The wilderness is a place of preparation for the soul.

Take the time to reflect on your life, maybe you will discover some things you don’t like, but don’t focus on that, focus on how you can move forward. Work on getting the knowledge, meeting the people and developing the skills you need to take you to the next level. You cannot shift, unless you are ready and being ready means being prepared. So use your wilderness experience to prepare for your next level.